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I drew back。 I could take no more。 I clung to Akasha like a child。 I held to her neck with my left hand； my forehead against her heavy black plaits； and I kissed her； over and over again； I kissed her； as though that and only that were the most eloquent gesture in the world。
Enkil did not stir。 Akasha did not stir。 I sighed and that was the only sound。
Then I withdrew and knelt down before both of them； and I gave my thanks。
How pletely and totally I loved her； my shimmering Egyptian goddess。 How I believed that she belonged to me。
Then for a long time I pondered this problem with Eudoxia； and I saw it a little more clearly。
It occurred to me that in the absence of a clear sign to Eudoxia； my battle with her would be to the death。 She would never allow me to remain in this city； and she meant to take Those Who Must Be Kept from me； so that I would have to use the Fire Gift against her as best I could。 What had happened earlier this night was only the beginning of our little war。
It was dreadfully sad to me； because I admired Eudoxia； but I knew that she had been far too humiliated by our struggle ever to give in。
I looked up at Akasha。 〃How do I fight this creature to the death？ 〃 I asked。 〃This creature has your blood in her。 I have your blood in me。 But surely there must be a clearer sign of what you mean for me to do？〃
I stayed there for an hour or more； and then finally I went out。
I found Avicus and Mael waiting where I had left them。
〃She's given me her blood；〃 I said。 〃This isn't a boast。 I only mean for you to know it。 And I believe that that is her sign。 But how can I know？ I believe that she does not want to be given over to Eudoxia； and she will destroy if provoked。〃
Avicus looked desperate。
〃In all our years in Rome；〃 he said； 〃We were blessed that no one of great strength ever challenged us。〃
I agreed with him。 〃Strong blood drinkers stay away from others like them；〃 I said。 〃But you must see； surely； that we are challenging her。 We could leave as she has asked us to do。〃
〃She has no right to ask this of us；〃 said Avicus。 〃Why can't she try to love us？ 〃
〃Love us？〃 I asked； repeating his words。 〃What makes you say such a strange thing？ I know that you're enamored of her。 Of course。 I've seen this。 But why should she love us？〃
〃Precisely because we are strong；〃 he responded。 〃She has only the weakest blood drinkers around her； creatures no more than half a century in age。 We can tell her things； things she may not know。〃
〃Ah； yes； I thought the same things when I first laid eyes on her。 But with this one it's not to be。〃
〃Why？〃 he asked again。
〃If she wanted strong ones like us； they would be here；〃 I said。 And then I said dejectedly； 〃We can always go back to Rome。〃
He had no answer for that。 I didn't know whether I meant it myself。
As we went up the steps and through the tunnels to the surface； I took his arm。
〃You're mad with thoughts of her；〃 I said。 〃You must regain your spiritual self。 Don't love her。 Make it a simple act of will。〃
He nodded。 But he was too troubled to conceal it。
I glanced at Mael； and found him more calm about all this than I had imagined。 Then came the inevitable question：
〃Would she have destroyed Avicus if you hadn't opposed her？〃 Mael asked。
〃She was going to give it a very good try；〃 I said。 〃But Avicus is very old； older than you or me。 And possibly older than her。 And you've seen his strength tonight。〃
Uneasy； filled with misgivings； and bad thoughts； we went to our unholy rest。
The following night； as soon as I rose； I knew that there were strangers in our house。 I was furious； but had some sense even then that anger renders one weak。
Mael and Avicus came to me immediately； and the three of us went to discover Eudoxia and the terrified Asphar with her； and two other young male blood drinkers whom we had not see before。
All were settled within my library as if they were invited guests。
Eudoxia was dressed in splendid and heavy Eastern robes with long bell sleeves； and Persian slippers； and her thick black curls were gathered above her ears with jewels and pearls。
The room was not as fine as the one in which she had received me； as I had not finished with my furnishings and other such things； and therefore she appeared the most sumptuous ornament in view。
I was struck once more by the beauty of her small face； especially I think by her mouth； though her cold dark eyes were as mesmerizing as before。
I felt sorry for the miserable Asphar who was so afraid of me； and as for the other two blood drinkers； both boys in mortal life； and young in immortality； I felt rather sorry for them too。
Need I say that they were beautiful？ They had been grown children when they were taken； that is； splendid beings with adult bodies and chubby boyish cheeks and mouths。
〃Why have you e without an invitation？〃 I asked Eudoxia。 〃You sit in my chair as though you're my guest。〃
〃Forgive me；〃 she said gently。 〃I came because I felt pelled to e。 I've searched your house through and through。〃 〃You boast of this？ 〃I asked。
Her lips were parted as though she meant to answer but then the tears rose in her eyes；
〃Where are the books； Marius？〃 she said softly。 She looked at me。 〃Where are all the old books of Egypt？ The books that were in the temple； the books that you stole？〃 I didn't answer。 I didn't sit down。
〃I came because I hoped to find them；〃 she said； staring forward； her tears falling。 〃I came here because last night I dreamed of the priests in the temple； and how they used to tell me that I ought to read the old tales。〃
Still I didn't answer。
She looked up； and then with the back of one hand； she wiped at her tears。 〃I could smell the scents of the temple； the scent of papyrus；〃 she said。 〃I saw the Elder at his desk。〃
〃He put the Parents in the sun； Eudoxia；〃 I said。 〃Don't slide into a dream that makes him innocent。 The Elder was evil and guilty。 The Elder was selfish and bitter。 Would you know his ultimate fate？〃
〃In my dream； the priests told me that you took the books； Marius。 They said that； unopposed； you came into the library of the temple and took all the old scrolls away。〃
I said nothing。
But her grief was heartrending。
〃Tell me； Marius。 Where are those books？ If you will let me read them； if you will let me read the old stories of Egypt； then my soul can find some peace with you。 Can you do that much for me？〃
How bitterly did I draw in my breath。
〃Eudoxia；〃 I said gently。 〃They're gone； those books； and all that remains of them is here； in my head。〃 I tapped the side of my forehead。 〃In Rome； when the savages from the North breached the city； my house was burnt and my library destroyed。〃
She shook her head and put her hands to the side of her face as though she could not bear this。
I went down on my knees beside her and I tried to turn her to me； but she would have none of it。 Her tears were shed quietly。
〃I'll write it all out； all that I remember； and there is so much that I remember；〃 I said。 〃Or shall I tell it aloud for our scribes？ You decide how you will receive it； and I'll give it to you； lovingly。 I understand what you desire。〃
This was not the time to tell her that much of what she sought came to nothing； that the old tales had been full of superstition and nonsense and even incantations that meant nothing at all。
Even the wicked Elder had said so。 But I had read these scrolls during my years in Antioch。 I remembered them。 They were inside my heart and soul。
She turned to me slowly。 And lifting her left hand； she stroked my hair。
〃Why did you steal those books！〃 she whispered desperately； her tears still flowing。 〃Why did you take them from a sanctum where they had been safe for so long！〃
〃I wanted to know what they said；〃 I answered candidly。 〃Why didn't you read them when you had a lifetime to do it？ 〃 I asked gently。 〃Why didn't you copy them when you copied for the Greeks and the Romans？ How can you blame me now for what I did？ 〃
〃Blame you？〃 she said earnest