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their existence; in memory and in prospect; but for the moment;
she ceased to be tortured by their effects。—She was at leisure; she
could read and think;—tho’ her situation was hardly such as to
make reflection very soothing。 The Evils arising from the loss of
her Uncle; were neither trifling; nor likely to lessen; and when
Thought had been freely indulged; in contrasting the past and the
present; the employment of mind; the dissipation of unpleasant
ideas which only reading could produce; made her thankfully turn
to a book。—The change in her home society; and stile of Life in
consequence of the death of one friend and the imprudence of
another had indeed been striking。—From being the first object of
Hope and Solicitude of an Uncle who had formed her mind with
the care of a Parent; and of Tenderness to an Aunt whose amiable
temper had delighted to give her every indulgence; from being the
Life and Spirit of a House; where all had been comfort and
Elegance; and the expected Heiress of an easy Independance; she
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Jane Austen: The Watsons 56
was become of importance to no one; a burden on those; whose
affection she could not expect; an addition in an House; already
overstocked; surrounded by inferior minds with little chance of
domestic comfort; and as little hope of future support。—It was well
for her that she was naturally chearful;—for the Change had been
such as might have plunged weak spirits in Despondence。
She was very much pressed by Robert and Jane to return with
them to Croydon; and had some difficulty in getting a refusal
accepted; as they thought too highly of their own kindness and
situation; to suppose the offer could appear in a less advantageous
light to anybody else。—Elizabeth gave them her interest; tho’
evidently against her own; in privately urging Emma to go—‘You
do not know what you refuse Emma’—said she—‘nor what you
have to bear at home。—I would advise you by all means to accept
the invitation; there is always something lively going on at
Croydon; you will be in company almost every day; and Robert
and Jane will be very kind to you。—As for me; I shall be no worse
off without you; than I have been used to be; but poor Margaret’s
disagreable ways are new to you; and they would vex you more
than you think for; if you stay at home。’ Emma was of course
uninfluenced; except to greater esteem for Elizabeth; by such
representations—and the Visitors departed without her。
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